climb jacob’s exclusive ladder
Notwithstanding Putin on the world stage and Trump in the US, the most divisive politician in Europe in the past decade has undoubtedly been Nigel Farage. Singlehandedly, he transformed UKIP from a party once described by David Cameron as “fruitcakes, loonies and closet racists” (record-breaking Norris McWhirter, Rowan Atkinson’s brother, Rodney, Doris Karloff (aka Ann Widdecombe) and the perma-tanned Robert Kilroy-Silk were the more famous odd-ball members) into an entity that forced the PM’s hand wrt the 2016 referendum. Without that action there would have been no Brexit, no Boris Johnson premiership and, potentially, no war in the Ukraine.
Our Nige started on his antagonistic journey early and school chums recall him writing his initials merged together in the style of the National Front. He then landed himself in hot-water for singing Hitler Youth songs on camp, leading one teacher to comment “Farage was a racist, but that was no reason why he should not make a good prefect.” A priceless condemnation of the elite Dulwich College where the young miscreant was expensively ensconced.
Surviving both a life-threatening car crash and testicular cancer in his early twenties embodied Nigel with a certain fearless joie de vivre and recklessness towards life. Then in 2010, a plane he was flying in for a publicity stunt got its banner caught and ended up crashing in a field. Farage emerged bloodied but unbowed and swiftly ensured a photographer captured the image for posterity and as further evidence of his daring, action-man persona. Our man at the bar went on to achieve colossal success banging on relentlessly about what he’s against. The EU. Immigration. Red tape. 500ml measures. Straight bananas. The Establishment. But, short of warm beer, Sunday cricket on the village green and seaside Punch & Judy, he struggled to explain exactly what he is for. Steve Bannon, Trump’s alt-right spin doctor, also identified this vacuum when attempting to initiate a network of nationalists, including Farage: “The thing that’s missing is the ideas.” Rumour has it, his grasp of policy depth and detail is even less than our current PM.
So, as Jacob Rees-Mogg starts his new job as minister for fool’s errands, he’s finding that the long-awaited Brexit opportunities are proving a little tricky to identify. This may be why his first act was to appeal to readers of The Sun to write in to him with suggestions of “ANY petty old EU regulation that should be abolished.” I kid you not and strongly suspect his welcome mat has not been troubled by many respondents. However, the downsides grow ever more glaring: the Public Accounts Committee reported last month declaring a ‘clear increase in costs, paperwork and border delays’; more than half of importers and exporters complained of additional paperwork and higher costs. Any upsides tend to prove illusory and/or trivial.
Mind, the wafer-thin Benefits of Brexit document – said ominously to ‘build upon the work and ideas of Iain Duncan Smith’ (WTF – ed.) – does indeed highlight one area in which both Naughty Nigel and the Right Honourable Member for the 18th Century may be interested in: financial regulation.
With Brexit done, Farage’s latest venture along with GB News, a daily emailed newsletter, Fortune & Freedom, is described by the great man himself as “a financial movement built with you in mind.” “Having teamed-up with the only people in the financial world I trust” Farage intends for you to take back control of your money. Sadly, he fails to recognise that F&F is part of an American group with a history of being consistently targeted by US regulators for “preying on customers with misleading and deceptive claims and practices” and suffers from a Trustpilot negative rating of 61%. “Do yourself a favour and just don’t” was one lovely review which caught my eye. Mercifully, next year he’s allowed to draw upon the safety net of his £70k tax-free MEP pension.
I’m supremely confident top-dollar fund manager Rees-Mogg will be on the case as we know he’s an ever-astute market mover and shaker, as it was his very own Somerset Capital that, in 2018, two years after the referendum, set up a stellar fund in Dublin, within the, er… EU. Admitting now “that it may take as many as fifty years to feel the benefits of Brexit”, it’s all too obvious that Jacob’s attuned to realising far more immediate short-term personal opportunities than worrying about the long-term…
