don’t be in such a rush
Later today I’ll be going to the shops. I’ll be popping into the paper shop, the post office and the fishmonger’s, well, Waitrose’s fish counter to be perfectly honest. And in anticipation of such a trip, I’ll be writing a shopping list. My, how quaint this must appear to those very clever people at Amazon. A couple of weeks ago a pal of mine, who had interviewed at Amazon for a big marketing job, explained how the ‘internet of all things’ as they like to be known, really do want to control everything we buy, send, look at and consume. Megalomania really does not do this company justice, and I think he should count his lucky stars that this particular Faustian pact was never followed-up on.
As part of Amazon’s campaign to ensure we never need to leave the comfort of our four walls ever again, they’re now brining us the Dash button, a wee device that we are encouraged to strategically place next to our most valuable of household supplies. Yep, for those panic inducing moments when the toothpaste tube runs dry, the final sheet of toilet paper slips off the roll, or Mr Sheene spits out his final gasp of furniture polish, all we need to do is hit the Dash button, and hey presto, within the hour Jeff Bezos will have instructed his retail minions to zoom round with all haste to replenish our dwindling stocks. Hey, I’m still on the pan, pop-up and give me a quick wipe could you?
So, why do I find news of the Amazon Dash so dispiriting? I guess because it’s just one more seemingly irreversible step towards our eventual extinction. Contemptible, yet inevitable. The horrid ‘dash’ toward individual passivity cleverly wrapped-up as customer convenience. If I’d known that technology would advance to the point where I wouldn’t have to think for myself, God forbid make a list, plan for the future, and even get-off my lardy a*se and go and get the things myself, then what’s the point of us being here? An Amazon life? Rest assured, it’s probably in the pipeline.
