what’s it all about
…Alfie!
A freeze in the basic and 30-hour working tax credit. A 10% reduction in claimable childcare costs. A freeze in the savings credit element of pension credit. A rise in the state pension age to 66. 60% off the budget for building affordable homes. Higher rents for social housing tenants. Massive uncertainty within the Public Sector both in terms of service provision and job security. A 15% reduction in daylight hours and rainwater to be rationed at source from 2012.
OK, I made the last two up but you get the general picture that pain and grief is on the way in bucketfuls. But how do I know? If redundancy were imminent, or I was on incapacity benefit, or I was 65, then I’d know pretty much how I was going to hit but I’m not and I have to admit that, in reality, I don’t really know how all the recent changes in George’s momentous spending review are actually going to affect me. Am I the norm or the exception in this regard? I reckon the former.
Anyone looking to last week’s papers for a answer may well also have been stumped. ‘Axe falls on the poor’ proclaimed The Guardian, while The Torygraph railed ‘Cuts leave middle class £10,000 worse off’. The Daily Mirror said the reductions ‘will hit the poorest hardest’ whilst The Daily Mail believed ‘households on incomes of £48,700 or more will lose most’. Confused? You should be. There’s undoubtedly devil in the detail (and obviously room for considerable argument over these) but what I think it’s all leading to has to be a general feeling of uncertainty, of insecurity, of austerity and of tightening the ol’ belt.
In practice, this means we’ll all spend less, we won’t move house as often, the five year old car will perhaps remain in the garage occasionally as the bike is dusted down and oiled for the trip to the shops, the shop will be Tesco as opposed to Waitrose, go-compare will do a roaring trade as we all seek out cheaper home insurance, pension payments will further decline, Christmas may only start in December and I will darn those socks. So, not all bad then. But what still gets my goat is that those that caused all this are still the last ones, and the most least likely, to suffer. Do you think the profligate and irresponsible financiers with their junk bonds and impossibly leveraged get-rich schemes are busy trimming their expenditure and cutting their cloth accordingly? Nah, me neither.
I’ve also observed there are other tell-tale signs that we’re in a recession and here are my perceptive Piscean insights:
1. Tradesmen call you back. Even plumbers.
2. Buskers start playing songs you recognise.
3. Hospitality boxes remain empty. Even at the Emirates.
4. Health clubs waive their mandatory joining fee.
5. Waitresses are better looking. Models and actresses are ‘between appointment’ and restaurants need to get you in by hook(er) or by crook.
6. The interesting, educated and polite cabbie appears from behind the glass.
7. The pound-shop takes over the empty deli.
8. Unkempt long hair on men suddenly comes back into fashion.
9. You have to queue for the bus.
10. Government advice proclaims we have to spend, spend, spend our way out of recession. They’re wrong, wrong, wrong.
